We are all created by our Divine to be beings of love. Each one of us strives to obtain recognition in love. We actively pursue love knowing that it will bring us feelings of being cherished for whom we are. We do this even from our childhoods. Yet how often do you hear a mom or dad saying to a child, if you do this mommy (or daddy) will love you etc. In doing this we set a price tag upon the love we say we have. In this circumstance we are raised believing that our worth is directly connected to receiving love.
As we grow older, we enter into relationships with boyfriends and girlfriends and bring what we have learned in childhood into the relationship. We say things like, “if you love me you will………” etc. and, taking what we have learned in our childhood, we proceed to set a price on the relationship. We do this in the effort to receive love.
The dictionary defines “lip service” as insincere respect, support or agreement that does not appear to be sincere because the words spoken are not followed up by the appropriate action or behavior.
I honestly believe that were we to love unconditionally, without any expectation of a return, we will alleviate many of the problems experienced in a relationship with another.
In so saying, it is important to remember that when we love in this fashion we love in entirety. This means that it is not enough to simply say “I love you”. Declarations of love are not just of the spoken kind but should be of the demonstrative kind also. To show others love is often more important and may have greater impact in the life of another, than to blithely verbalize it.
In this busy, rushed world in which we live, we often find ourselves dashing out the door and as we do we quickly say those magical words to those who remain behind. Yet do we really mean them? Is it not better to take just a moment of our time to stop and give that person a hug and perhaps a quick peck and then to declare your love for them? Surely this will have a greater impact in the life of the beneficiary of our love? I certainly believe it will.
Loving another means that you will do almost anything for them and you will do it with grace. You do it because you love that person so profoundly and want them to be in a state of happiness. You do it because you value the happiness of another so profoundly. This kind of love is self sacrificial. No matter your own personal emotions, you will be able to rise above it in the sake of ensuring that the recipient is happy.
It is relatively easy to do this for our children for they are our flesh and blood. To love in this totally unconditional manner is another thing entirely when loving in a relationship with a partner for example. We spend years of our lives in pursuit of finding the lid that fits our pot. Yet the moment we have committed to each other we begin the process of judgment and change in an attempt to get them to be what we want.
It’s really quite simple. Ask yourself what made you “fall in love” with that person and then accept them for what they are. Please do not set boundaries on love for they are doomed to failure. Be precipitant in sharing and declaring your love for there is none more exciting than the doing something so unexpected.
Be yourself and know that you are able to love and be love just as you are able to be loved and are lovable.
In love and light,
Amanda
Image courtesy of: http://serenadraws.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/lip_service.jpg
© Amanda C Nicolin 2011
Permission is granted to share this article freely on the condition that the author is credited.
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